republished deleted episodes. but i realized i'm missing episode nine. if anyone has it i would really appreciate somehow obtaining it again.

I'm sorry for building you up, buttercups, and then letting you down.

I found myself singing the song (is it called "build me up buttercup"?) while doing the laundry today and then got on the computer and realized why it popped into my head, it would seem, without provocation.

I need to do this podcast, but I don't know what to say, and I've already let everyone down so much that they probably don't care if I ever put out another show. But I'll figure out something. I must.

I start my waitressing job Tuesday.

:(

obviously, there was no podcast.

This year has been pretty bad for me. but i'm featured in the yearbook, which comes out monday, which is scary.

I got a brand new computer, a macbook, once my retarded old compaq broke down finally, so I FINALLY have the equiptment to record a podcast before my computer SHUTS DOWN on me. but i'm very stressed out and busy at the moment. Only a few more days of school, and then I look forward to a great summer of podcasting.

i have a choir concert to be at in approximately 8 minutes, but I'll be in touch, i promise.

oh dear whoever-reads-this, i am still alive. i'm sorry for breaking my promise to podcast more frequently. but i'm failing two classes. not because of this podcast, but because i threw way too much time away on pointless things like the school newspaper and attempting to be a regular kid instead of doing my math homework. finals are this week. i'm out of school thursday if i do okay on all of them. hope to see you thursday-ish, because i have so muchhhh gooood music to play :\!

If everyone, stupid, intelligent, whatever; is allowed to speak, theories might be easily organized according to whatever motivated them: right and wrong. I can't classify everything. Nobody's opinion is definitive. But I want to know how people think. I want to know why I think the way I think. I want to know how to change the way people think about the things they don't think about. I want my way of thinking to be challenged. I want people to think in general. So will you please argue?! discuss?! listen?! have an opinion?! Otherwise, none of us will ever know what's smart and what's not.

I'm not going to lie. I'm extremely curious about everything. I feel like I have to theorize about it all, because I don't know how else to sort the world out. I am not smart. I am pretty ridiculous sometimes. And I don't know what else to do about this, really, except absorb everything I possibly can.

Despite the uninformative nature of this post, I hope you didn't mind it.

I tried to make a podcast tonight, but I'm not making any sense and am frustrated with my microphone. and... I don't understand physics. I'll take a break and keep trying...

I blatantly forgot to mention a million things. Namely, how BEAUTIFUL the weather was Friday and Saturday because of a cold front (it hadn't been 68 degrees for at least eight or nine months). It felt like we were on a different planet. and the lovely digital detroit radio shirt I made (I didn't sew it or anything, I just colored on it); go look at my flickr page.

newspaper has me losing my mind. there you have it. mindless. so... I'll try to do better next time and whatnot.

I am very easily carried away by emotion, also very strong monsters. And I am really regretting my last two podcasts. Just because they were so angry and frustrated. Hm, the only thing I hope is that I don't sound like someone who thinks they're all intelligent as they say the words "how, now, brown cow" with a british accent. I actually have no idea where that comes from. I think a cartoon or something.

But, I have some cool stuff on the way. Looks like tomorrow will be it. I wouldn't ramble here if I didn't really feel like an idiot. I just want to acknowledge the stupidity, that's all. I am still very much a happy lady. :D!!!

seriously. no more talking. ever. again. I promise. well maybe a little talking.